The Fosix Diet - Part Deux
Kabuli Chana*, eat lots of it !! The more you eat, the more gas is generated. The more gas that is generated, the more lighter you become**. As simple as that !!
Now all I have to figure out is how much KC a person needs to eat to lose weight on the weighing scale. Damn, if only I were intelligent !! I could have worked out the physics/maths of this. Maybe some smart reader*** can help me figure this out ?
Sample Problem Statement: How many grams of KC will it take to reduce the weight of a 140 pound cylinder (of height 5'11" and circumference 31") by one pound ?
The person who comes up with the correct equation for this problem will be given one years supply of Krispy Kreme doughnuts.
Alternatively, Rajma**** could also be used in place of KC. Although extensive studies still need to be conducted to determine which one has more gas generating power.
* - Garbanzo beans (translation for any non-desi reader)
** - Assuming that you dont fart and waste it !!
*** - Now why would any smart person be reading my blog ??
**** - Kidney beans (one more translation for all you non-desis !!)
13 Comments:
are chick peas different from garbanzo ???
your dietary plan will work only if the volumary weight of the bean-generated gas is lighter than the volumary weight of the surrounding atmosphere...
do i make it to the "***" category ?
I cant help cause I suck at Math. It always succeeds in failing me! Sighhh..I hate the world where math=smart. Bah! Saddest cock I have heard. After Sonia Gandhi to speak in Hindi that is. Or speaking at all!
@seashells
yup, chick peas are the same as garbanzo... but no, you dont make it to the *** category because even i knew that :D
and speaking of gas, i wonder which is more flammable, gas generated from garbanzo beans or gas from kidney beans ?
@crouching tigress
you dont need math to be smart... you are a MBA... so you get a free ticket into the smart category... btw, i suck at math too... and i'm an engineer !! :)
LOL... reminds me of a south park episode... where in Kenny dies because his fart catches fire... Now, if only we knew what he ate...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
@seashells
to answer you other question: yes, i came back from a late late party and decided to see what the blogger community was upto before i hit the sack... :)
After my trip to India, I am ready to give any dietary plan a try.So garbanzo beans it is...
Is that how you plan to lower your cholesterol?
Thanks for stopping by my blog.
@second_wind
Since you are anyway trying out my diet plan, I was wondering if you could also perform the flammability studies for me. i.e., find out which kind of bean produces more flammable gas.
I would have conducted the tests myself, however due to the socio-economic impact of the march of the penguins in Antarctica and the migration of llamas away from Easter Island, beans are no longer being exported to Michigan. So if you could perform the tests for me, i'd really appreciate it.
Maybe this 'natural' gas could be the answer to the worlds dependence on oil !!!
@m(tsu)
No, this was not part of cholestrol reducing plan. The weight-reduction idea struck me after a heavy lunch one day while I was napping on my couch and was rudely awakened by the smoke and carbon-monoxide alarms going off.
:)))))))) you're kidding, right? The CO alarm I might buy but smoke detector??? What did you light up too?
I know this story which probably is not true about a guy who ate a lot of kidney beans and slept in a closed room. In the morning he wouldn't open the door because he died from his own gas. So someone called the paramedics. the story goes the paramedic who entered the room after they broke down the door fainted. And ended up being taken to the hospital along with the dead guy.
ha! I am happy that you did not get any more serious in my blog...Your seriousness is so funny...anyways waiting for a new post from you
Anu
@m(tsu)
well i wasnt completely dead that day... you wont believe the miracles of modern medicine and what they are capable of doing these days... ;)
as far as whether i was kidding or not, you can check out all the comments on seashells "coool stuff !!!" post... that should answer your question... :D
@anu
yup, new post coming up today (hopefully)...
Very pretty site! Keep working. thnx!
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